Psalm 96

Amplified Bible

¹ O sing to the Lord a new song; sing to the Lord, all the earth!

² Sing to the Lord, bless (affectionately praise) His name; show forth His salvation from day to day.

³ Declare His glory among the nations, His marvelous works among all the peoples.

⁴ For great is the Lord and greatly to be praised; He is to be reverently feared and worshiped above all [so–called] gods.

⁵ For all the gods of the nations are [lifeless] idols, but the Lord made the heavens.

⁶ Honor and majesty are before Him; strength and beauty are in His sanctuary.

⁷ Ascribe to the Lord, O you families of the peoples, ascribe to the Lord glory and strength.

⁸ Give to the Lord the glory due His name; bring an offering and come [before Him] into His courts.

⁹ O worship the Lord in the beauty of holiness; tremble before and reverently fear Him, all the earth.

¹⁰ Say among the nations that the Lord reigns; the world also is established, so that it cannot be moved; He shall judge and rule the people righteously and with justice.

¹¹ Let the heavens be glad, and let the earth rejoice; let the sea roar, and all the things which fill it;

¹² Let the field be exultant, and all that is in it! Then shall all the trees of the wood sing for joy

¹³ Before the Lord, for He comes, for He comes to judge and govern the earth! He shall judge the world with righteousness and justice and the peoples with His faithfulness and truth.

Today is one of those marker moments in life. Feeling compelled to build an altar to the Lord, this blog post is written as a remembrance of God’s love, His goodness and His faithfulness to our family.

Our third born daughter, Malorie Jane Bullard released her debut album entitled “Close to You” at midnight on November 3, 2023! As a mother, I am proud of her accomplishments and grateful for the many gifts God has given. But there’s so much more to her song story than notes and lyrics.

In the summer of 2002, I suffered a traumatic miscarriage with my third pregnancy. When I began hemorrhaging at home, I knew something was dreadfully wrong. After checking in with my OB/GYN that confirmed no heartbeat, we were immediately sent to the hospital for an emergency D&C. The doctor warned me that the situation was complicated and to prepare for the worse-  I may not conceive any more children. When I woke from surgery, I was weeping uncontrollably. The nurse tried to comfort me, to no avail. I went home stunned, in shock, and deeply grieved for the large family I believe God had promised. At the same time, I was grateful for the two little girls I held in my arms during recovery.

That fall, I discovered I was pregnant again! The doctor confirmed, but warned again of the complications I had suffered and that statistically I was at greater risk of another miscarriage. In order to ensure a healthy pregnancy, weekly blood tests were required. At some point, I decided I was done being afraid. I told God I would trust Him, regardless of the outcome. At 18 weeks’ gestation, an ultra-sound confirmed the miraculous! Safe inside her mother’s womb, a sweet baby girl was growing in the shelter of His wings. On July 3, 2003 Malorie Jane Bullard made her silent debut into the world amidst all the noise; I was screaming and speaking in unknown languages having suffered horrendous back labor and unplanned natural childbirth! Holding our little bundle of joy there in the hospital, we were completely unaware of the challenges that lie ahead…

For the first four months of life, she screamed & cried uncontrollably, projectile vomiting after every feeding. We were unable to sooth or comfort her in any way. Even while nursing, she seemed distant and unable to bond with me. I also cried uncontrollably as we made multiple trips to doctors and hospitals for help. We tried every formula on the market, medication and expert recommendation. Again, at some point I decided I was done being afraid. If she had to continue to endure such pain with projectile vomiting, she would do so in her mother’s arms, drinking her mother’s milk. At four months old, we supplemented her feedings with rice cereal which helped weigh the contents of her stomach down long enough to digest more nutrients. She was eighteen months old before the raging reflux and vomiting ceased. By then, however, we were in the midst of another storm…

I had noticed Malorie wouldn’t make eye contact with me. Or anyone else. She seemed to live in her own little world. And when others interrupted that space, she became violent. She relied on me for her basic needs, but there was no connection. For the first four years of her life she remained silent. She did eventually learn to say “ma-ma” and “da-da,” and a few other unrecognizable words. Countless doctors and specialists ignored my cries for help. So, I began doing my own research. Information about Autism was just beginning to be published and so I pushed and pushed and pushed doctors until a first-year physician’s assistant FINALLY listened and referred us to UNC Hospitals for an evaluation. Upon completing a 25-page application separately, my husband and I joined hundreds of other families on a two-year waiting list.

In the meantime, God called us to withdraw our oldest two girls from public school to homeschool. Continuing Autism research in my spare time (ha ha!) I discovered many practical tools that helped Malorie thrive at home. When it was time for her to start Kindergarten, she joined our homeschool. Even though she was still non-verbal, she listened and learned alongside her sisters every day. Later that year, Malorie was diagnosed with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder). Seated around a large conference table with highly educated experts, they questioned her miraculous improvement. She had started talking, interacting with us, a few others, and showing a profound love of music. After noticing her stimming/flapping when music was on in the house, I intentionally began playing classical and children’s tapes for the girls during the day, in the car, and every night at bedtime. And when our second oldest began piano lessons a few years later, I decided to sign Malorie up too!

A songwriter since age 9, Malorie Jane Bullard is no longer silent.

She was made to sing a new song!

Isaiah 40:1-5

Amplified Bible

40 Comfort, comfort My people, says your God.

² Speak tenderly to the heart of Jerusalem, and cry to her that her time of service and her warfare are ended, that [her punishment is accepted and] her iniquity is pardoned, that she has received [punishment] from the Lord’s hand double for all her sins.

³ A voice of one who cries: Prepare in the wilderness the way of the Lord [clear away the obstacles]; make straight and smooth in the desert a highway for our God!

⁴ Every valley shall be lifted and filled up, and every mountain and hill shall be made low; and the crooked and uneven shall be made straight and level, and the rough places a plain.

⁵ And the glory (majesty and splendor) of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together; for the mouth of the Lord has spoken it.