Give Up Your Life

June 5, 2017June 5, 2017 / Jodie / 1 Comment

Ephesians 5:25 New Living Translation (NLT)

²⁵For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her…

Last week, as we were cruising down the road through our little southern town, our ten year old son randomly asked “daddy, what would you give up in the whole wide world to be with mommy?” My groom looked over at me in the passenger seat. Our eyes widened, as if to say, “where did THAT thought come from?” The little man in the backseat repeated himself “what would you give up, dad?” Glancing back in the rearview mirror my groom confessed, “buddy….…I don’t know!”

My heart has silently been asking that same question since the moment I said, “I do” on May 18, 1996. For more than 21 years, I’ve longed for my husband to give up his life. Not to physically die, but to emotionally die to the things that steal his time and attention away from loving me. Fortunately, I have the privilege of saying that I’ve been the beneficiary of a man who has crucified selfish ambition, hobbies and bad habits in years past. Whether He was motivated by the Holy Spirit, or by my persistent “encouragement” the result was the same: He obeyed God and I reaped the overflowing reward: Love.

Listen up fellas! I’m gonna let you in on a secret:

If you lay down your life, your wife will feel loved.

When your wife feels loved, she will submit to you.

If both of you submit to the Lord and one another you will become one.

You may be thinking: “Dag gone it. I work my tail off every day, providing for my family…and she doesn’t even appreciate it!!!” I’m sorry about that. It’s incredibly ungrateful of her. It would be nice if she praised you for your work, but regardless, it’s your role. Read Genesis 2-3. Adam worked hard. It’s your “job” to provide food, clothing and shelter for your family. But just in case you think I’m being unfair, re-read Genesis 2-3. Do you have children? Eve had pain and so did your wife. Now read Proverbs 31. Does your wife manage the home? Does she have a “job” too? Does she train your children? Does she help others in the community and in the church?

Love her.

Give up your life for her.

It’s no more than what Jesus did for you. It’s no more than what He did for His bride, the church. He submitted His will to the Father every moment of every day. He worked. He served (and He wasn’t praised). He suffered. He was betrayed. He was mocked. He was beaten. He was falsely accused. He was crucified. He willingly gave up His life.

Give up your life.

You may be thinking: “how do I do that- practically?”

What are some things the Holy Spirit has been whispering for you to give up?

What are some things your wife has been persistently “encouraging” you to give up?

TV
Social Media
Video games
Hobbies
Sports
Alcohol
Drugs
Pornography
Prized possessions
Serving the community or church (but not your family)
An unhealthy relationship with a friend, family member, or co-worker

Here’s the challenge: Give it up for 40 days. See what God does in your life- and your marriage.

Love, Your Wife.

God Tested

April 6, 2017March 27, 2017 / Jodie / 1 Comment

Genesis 22:1-2, 9-12

Some time later, God tested Abraham’s faith. “Abraham!” God called.

“Yes,” he replied. “Here I am.”

2 “Take your son, your only son—yes, Isaac, whom you love so much—and go to the land of Moriah. Go and sacrifice him as a burnt offering on one of the mountains, which I will show you.”

9 When they arrived at the place where God had told him to go, Abraham built an altar and arranged the wood on it. Then he tied his son, Isaac, and laid him on the altar on top of the wood. 10 And Abraham picked up the knife to kill his son as a sacrifice. 11 At that moment the angel of the Lord called to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!”

“Yes,” Abraham replied. “Here I am!”

12 “Don’t lay a hand on the boy!” the angel said. “Do not hurt him in any way, for now I know that you truly fear God. You have not withheld from me even your son, your only son.”

On the night of our wedding rehearsal, my father-in-law proposed a toast. It was a heartfelt speech, welcoming me into the Bullard tribe. Yes, tribe. A full-blooded Native American of the Lumbee Tribe, my father-in-law came from a very large close-knit family. Growing up in extreme poverty and feeling the sting of prejudice from southern white and black men alike, he left the tribal area to pursue a better life for himself.

But he never forgot his family.

Family was everything.

With raised glasses and our entire wedding party giving close attention, my fiancés father spoke assertively, “Jodie, you are now a part of our family…and we take care of our own.”

(kindof sounded like I was marrying into the mafia!!!)

Doug Sr. and I had a rocky beginning. I was a strong willed young woman. Barely 18 when I met his son, Doug Jr. (who was almost 6 years my senior), I was a rebellious, directionless sinner. He was a strong, disciplined, God fearing man. Needless to say, we didn’t get along very well- especially when I sat in HIS lazy boy recliner one Sunday afternoon to watch HIS naptime entertainment; golf!

Six months later, after Doug and I were engaged, he disapproved of the impending nuptials. Yet over the course of the next year and a half, we began to know- and love one another. And by the time my wedding day dawned, he had accepted me as a daughter, adopting me into his family on a warm spring day in 1996. Fifteen months later he had a massive heart attack. The family patriarch was gone.

After God adopted me into His family, I had a hard time trying to love Him with all my heart, mind, soul and strength. I was disciplined: I read the bible. I prayed. I served at church. Yet, I was completely unaware that in a dark corner of my soul, I had built an idol. It was named “family.”

Then God tested me.

He asked if I was willing to take each family member, whom I loved so much, and lay them on the altar.

Would I justify my relationships? (“God- you designed family. I’m supposed to love my husband, children, parents….)

Or would I repent?

I confessed the lie: family is everything.

I received His truth: God is everything.

I choose to obey the commandments, in order.

There’s a reason Jesus said we are to love God, then love others. Others may take care of us, train us, love us and welcome us into their family, but others will fail us. Idols will fall.

Yes, we must love our spouse, children, parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents. But we must not love them more than Jesus.

Matthew 10:37

“If you love your father or mother more than you love me, you are not worthy of being mine; or if you love your son or daughter more than me, you are not worthy of being mine.

Has God tested you?

Have you confessed the lie: family is everything?

Have you received His truth: God is everything?

Have you chosen to love God, then love others?

I’m sorry to disappoint you, my friend: all of your family has sinned.

They’ve all fallen short of the glory of God.

They will never give you eternal or abundant life.

They will forsake you.

They will leave you.

But, Jesus.

Jesus was the perfect sacrifice.

Jesus laid down His life on the altar for your sin.

Jesus will never leave you.

Jesus will never forsake you.

(and like the mafia, Jesus always takes care of His own!!!)

Pain, Desire & Struggle

March 30, 2017March 24, 2017 / Jodie / Leave a comment

Genesis 3:16-19 (NLT)

16 Then he said to the woman,

“I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy,

and in pain you will give birth.

And you will desire to control your husband,

but he will rule over you.[a]”

17 And to the man he said,

“Since you listened to your wife and ate from the tree

whose fruit I commanded you not to eat,

the ground is cursed because of you.

All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it.

18 It will grow thorns and thistles for you,

though you will eat of its grains.

19 By the sweat of your brow

will you have food to eat

until you return to the ground

from which you were made.

For you were made from dust,

and to dust you will return.”

How well I know the curse of pain as a daughter of Eve. All my pregnancies produced physical and emotional suffering in my body and soul. I delivered one daughter without drugs, but ALL our children caused indescribable pain when I gave birth.

How well I know the desire to control my husband. As a newlywed, I believed I was to share “the pants,” in order to rule and reign together as head of the family. In my rebelliousness and brokenness I used my strong personality to gain control… and when my husband attempted to lead, I viciously attacked him with my words.

Then I met Jesus.

Jesus became the curse for me, a sinful daughter of Eve. He died not only to give me eternal life with my Father in heaven, but He also gives me abundant life in Him on earth! No longer am I enslaved to the curse. I am a daughter of the King of kings and Lord of lords. Yet, sometimes, unfortunately….I still listen to that slithering, sneaky snake.

Jesus said in this world, I will have trouble.

Pain will still occur.

Desire to control will still rise up.

But, Jesus.

Jesus.

When I choose to trust Jesus, instead of the enemy, I receive God’s blessing: abundant life! I am comforted in pain. I know that He is in control. I submit to my husband, as unto the Lord. And even if my husband doesn’t love me as Christ loved the church, I feel how wide, how deep, how high, my Father’s love is for me.

For more than 20 years I’ve watched my husband scratch a living. By the sweat of his brow, he has provided food for our family each day. As a son of Adam, the curse proclaimed over his life is different than mine. It affects his work mentality. Mine affects my relationships with him and our children. Regardless, if either of us chooses to submit to the enemy, the same result occurs: death.

If I am deceived, and my husband listens to me, and we both eat the forbidden fruit, spiritual and emotional death separates us from God- and one another.

Does that mean its all my fault?

No.

I am accountable for my sin- not my husbands, not my children’s. Mine.

My husband is accountable for his.

When a husband listens and obeys God’s commands, he finds his identity in the One who formed him from the dust of the earth. His work is not who he is. He is a son of God.

When a wife listens and obeys God’s commands, she finds her identity in the One who formed her from man for man. Her role of mother and wife are not who she is. She is a daughter of God.

Who are you listening to?

Who are you obeying?

Who are you choosing?

I choose life.

I choose the way.

I choose the truth.

I choose Jesus.

Your Own Work

March 16, 2017March 8, 2017 / Jodie / Leave a comment

Galatians 6:4-10 (NLT)

4 Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else. 5 For we are each responsible for our own conduct.

6 Those who are taught the word of God should provide for their teachers, sharing all good things with them.

7 Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant. 8 Those who live only to satisfy their own sinful nature will harvest decay and death from that sinful nature. But those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting life from the Spirit. 9 So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. 10 Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.

The comparison trap always leads to death in the soul. Whether we are measuring our waistline, our bank account, our marriage, or our position at work, comparing ourselves to others makes us dissatisfied. Either we feel like a loser (“they are way better at such and such than I am”) or, it inflates our ego (“I am way better at such and such than they are”).

KIM_2018_edited-1 The body of Christ is no exception. A worldly view of our family members of faith ranks people by where they serve. The people on stage are AWESOME! The people changing dirty diapers…not so much. God is not impressed by our ranking system. He is not amused with our justification for idolizing certain areas of service. He is not naive about our desire for attention or worthiness. He is not ignorant of the condition of our heart. He knows all. Yet, mercifully, He forgives all.

When we love the Lord with all our heart, mind, soul and strength our souls are set free from the comparison trap. We are still. We know Him. We know who we are in Him. We know the gifts the Spirit has given us. We know the talents the Lord has equipped us to use for His glory.

When we love Him, we obey Him.

When we obey Him, we submit to His will for our life.

When we submit to His will for our life, we do good – especially for those in the family of faith…..and it makes absolutely no difference to us if we use a microphone or a diaper to do it.

Pay attention.

Pay careful attention.

You are responsible for your own conduct.

Don’t compare yourself to anyone.

Thorns, Cares & Riches

March 9, 2017March 8, 2017 / Jodie / Leave a comment

Matthew 13:22 (KJV)

He also that received seed among the thorns is he that heareth the word; and the care of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, choke the word, and he becometh unfruitful.

Every summer, when I was a little girl, my mother would require my older sister and I to weed “the hill.”

Begrudgingly, we’d wake up in the wee morning hours to avoid the heat of the Southern California sun at midday, put on our garden gloves and start digging & pulling thorns out from the MASSIVE hill. (I may over-exaggerate a bit….but when you’re a kid, everything seems MASSIVE doesn’t it?!)

After several days of digging & pulling, “the hill” would be restored to its original beautiful landscape.

But you know what? By the next summer, we’d be out there digging & pulling MORE stinkin’ thorns!

Ugh.

Such is the case with children of God. We get saved and God gives us a glimpse of the beautiful landscape that He has planned for our lives. We soon discover, however, that as we seek His Kingdom, He begins to reveal hidden thorns that the enemy has planted on our hill! Yet, by His grace, we can believe His promise to deliver us and we can wake up in the wee morning hours, put on our garden gloves, and ask Him to start digging & pulling the cares & riches out!

Strong’s Concordance defines the Greek word for cares as merimna: “to draw in different direction, distract…that which causes a care, especially an anxious care.” Cares of the world can be any thorn the enemy plants in our mind that convinces us to believe a lie, instead of God’s truth. We can be distracted and anxious over our marriage, our children, our friends, our position at work, our position in the church- all of which choke out the Word, as people & position become more important to us than our Lord and Savior. Cares believe the lie that without the relationship or position, we won’t be loved or accepted. In short, we’ll be abandoned and alone.

Strong’s Concordance defines the Greek word for riches as pluotos: “wealth, money, possessions, abundance…used evilly.” Basically, it’s any tangible thing that we own which was obtained with a greedy heart. Riches believe the lie that God will not provide everything we need. It justifies “wants” as “needs.”

Our church just finished a sermon series on The Parables of the Four Soils in Matthew 13. Although it isn’t yet summer here in North Carolina (even though some days it feels like it!), the seed that I received from those teachings encouraged me to wake up in the wee morning hours, put on my garden gloves, and dig into the rich soil of God’s Word. I’ve come to realize that the enemy’s thorns will continue trying to choke out Truth to keep His Spirit from producing love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control in my life. BUT, I don’t need to worry, because Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. His Spirit will lead me into all Truth. When I seek Him, I will find Him. When I ask Him, He will reveal any cares of this world & deceitfulness of riches that have taken root in my soul. When I confess my sin to Him, He will forgive me. And if that weren’t enough, He’ll even restore my hill to its intended beauty.

Is your life producing love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control? Ask the Holy Spirit to show you any hidden thorns that are choking out His Word. Confess, repent and forgive for believing the lies associated with cares & riches. Choose to trust God in all things- and watch as He restores the landscape of your life into His intended beauty.

Wives, submit

August 31, 2016August 31, 2016 / Jodie / Leave a comment

Ephesians 5:22

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

Since the garden, Satan has been deceiving the daughters of Eve. In subtle ways, he twists the Truth to steal, kill and destroy marriages, which are designed to glorify God by reflecting Christ and His Bride, the church.

Wives, submit.

Submit how?

“As you do to the Lord.”

Would our Lord ask us to sin?

No.

Would our Lord ask us to sin in order to cover up our husband’s sin?

No.

When a husband rejects Gods Truth, allowing Satan to fill his heart, he will choose to lie to the Holy Spirit (sin). When a wife has FULL KNOWLEDGE of it (by agreeing with the lie) death will come to them both. Perhaps not physically, but it will come (spiritually and emotionally).

Acts 5:1-11

5 Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also sold a piece of property. 2 With his wife’s full knowledge he kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it at the apostles’ feet.

3 Then Peter said, “Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? 4 Didn’t it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn’t the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied just to human beings but to God.”

5 When Ananias heard this, he fell down and died. And great fear seized all who heard what had happened. 6 Then some young men came forward, wrapped up his body, and carried him out and buried him.

7 About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. 8 Peter asked her, “Tell me, is this the price you and Ananias got for the land?”

“Yes,” she said, “that is the price.”

9 Peter said to her, “How could you conspire to test the Spirit of the Lord? Listen! The feet of the men who buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out also.”

10 At that moment she fell down at his feet and died. Then the young men came in and, finding her dead, carried her out and buried her beside her husband. 11 Great fear seized the whole church and all who heard about these events.

If a wife remains submitted to the Lord in everything, her husband’s sin will affect her (because they are one), but it won’t kill her. For Jesus is her bridegroom and He will cover her, protect her and rescue her, as she hides and finds rest in the shelter of His wings (Psalm 91). Safe in His arms, she can intercede for her husband, asking the Lord to reveal Himself to him so that he will obey.

1 Peter 3: 1-2

In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over 2 by observing your pure and reverent lives.

Unfortunately, however, not all husbands are won over by the Good News. And sometimes, death must come to the marriage.

I don’t know your story dear sister, but I do know that God loves you and has great plans for you- and your marriage. His design is for you to submit to your husband as you do to the Lord. And His design is for your husband to love you by laying down his life for you, as Christ did for the church. If your husbands sin is physically or emotionally bringing death to you, or your children, please seek shelter from the Most High and ask someone in the church for help.

Sick of IT!

May 12, 2016 / Jodie / 2 Comments

Numbers 11:18-20

18 “And say to the people, ‘Purify yourselves, for tomorrow you will have meat to eat. You were whining, and the Lord heard you when you cried, “Oh, for some meat! We were better off in Egypt!” Now the Lord will give you meat, and you will have to eat it. 19 And it won’t be for just a day or two, or for five or ten or even twenty. 20 You will eat it for a whole month until you gag and are sick of it. For you have rejected the Lord, who is here among you, and you have whined to him, saying, “Why did we ever leave Egypt?”’”

I’m really good at whining. And when I am “sick of it” (whatever IT is) I can cry and cry and cry some more to the Lord- and others.

The current IT has kept me in the desert for several years. The scorching heat and lack of water began when my husband started working for a pharmaceutical company that required frequent travel. Having been through a year of unemployment 5 years ago, we are extremely grateful to have a steady income flowing into our bank account, but the adjustment of being separated has been excruciating at times. And time hasn’t made it easier. It’s just become an uncomfortable routine.

You’d think after a few years of this lifestyle I’d quit whining. Yeah, not so much. My mouth continues to pour out blessings and curses. This is not right.

James 3:10

10 And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right!

Thank you Lord for this job.

Thank you for a husband that works long, hard hours to provide for our family.

Thank you God for giving me the strength to train & teach our 4 children.

Thank you Father for the travel rewards our entire family benefits from as we explore Your world.

GOD. How much longer are we going to have to live like this?!

Why can’t my husband work close to home like other husbands?!

Why do I have to manage the house and kids by myself?!

Oh for some meat. We were better off in Egypt.

Uh….no we weren’t.

The truth is: God brought us out of Egypt. Not only did He deliver us financially- He removed us from the bonds of slavery in many areas of our life during that season of unemployment. He proved Himself to be our El-Shaddai, Jehovah-Jireh, Jehovah-Shamah.

Still, my flesh cries out for more. He’s sending manna & quail (enough to make me gag), but I’m anxious to reach the Promised Land. I’m such a stubborn Israelite.

Yet even in my rebellion, He still loves me.

This morning, as I sat down in the tent of meeting I turned to the bookmarked page in our chronological bible and stared at the page. Silently I whined “I’m soooooo sick of reading about Moses and the Israelites.” As the words from Numbers 11 filled my head, my eyes filled with tears and my soul felt the pang of conviction. I didn’t need to ask, but I did anyway, “Lord, I’ve been whining, haven’t, I?”

Without rejection, without condemnation, my Jehovah- Rohi gently rebuked me and called me back into the shelter of His wings (Psalm 91), beckoning me to trust Him, again..….to trust Him in the midst of the scorching heat of the desert.

So with new mercy today, I will.

Isaiah 41:18

18 I will open up rivers for them on the high plateaus.  I will give them fountains of water in the valleys.  I will fill the desert with pools of water.  Rivers fed by springs will flow across the parched ground.